Mellow New Year.

Today we woke up to a snowy Saturday Morning.

It is the first Saturday in 2026, and I have no idea of where I am going this year. Or even where I want to go.

I have been temping for the last half of the year. Obviously when you get ill, as I did, they simply replace you. But on reflection it was time to go. So as I start this year I have no job lined up.

When I moved here in 2020 I had no idea what I was going to do with work, and I had a strong belief that ‘Life’ would show me the way. Although I feel the same, this time it is different.

As I have got older I find myself becoming more and more misanthropic, and being part of the job market, with all that entails has not helped. I have had two long careers in my 44 years at work, and worked mainly in roles that require interaction with the general public. Trust me, that is a skill, and experience is priceless, but over the years the general public have become more demanding, and angry even.

Perhaps that is also part of my general feeling now.

Add to that experiencing discrimination (the company I worked with for over three years would not offer permanent roles to anyone who lived in the republic!) and ageism – despite having a wealth of skills when dealing with the public, I haven’t even got to interview for some roles that years ago I would have walked.

I have lost count of the amount of times I have been asked to talk someone through my CV at interview. What all 44 years?! On my most recent interview (for a 2 week temporary job) one interviewer asked me if I could use Microsoft Office. This was despite my CV showing I had been a PA to numerous senior healthcare professionals, and EA to a Medical Director!? When I told her I had an ECDL (European Computer Driving License) she asked what could I do on word. I wanted to say ‘Everything’! But instead I listed tables, agenda’s minutes, embedded documents…you get the picture. I started to lose the will to live.

My questions were about parking. It transpired there was no parking available and the office was in the middle of Derry (Londonderry) and meant a 15 minute walk to the office, with a daily charge of £9.00.. They clearly wanted someone to cover the Christmas period. It would have been impossible to park. I wasn’t well enough to get stressed with trying to park, or to walk to the office in bad weather. It was a part time post (which I wanted) but for only 2 weeks, at what was clearly one of the most difficult times of the year.

So I listened to my gut, and Life, whispering in my ear; and RD, who asked me what the hell I was doing. We had enough money behind us for me to take the time to recover, and to choose whether to take a role or not. It was hard for me to break that habit of always thinking I should work, putting work before myself. This time I listened and I withdrew from the process.

At times it has been so apparent, when being interviewed by someone half my age, that my experience intimidates them. Trust me, when you get to my age I am not looking for a career, or for going up the corporate ladder, I just want to come in, do my job to the best of my ability and go home.

However it does raise the question for me ‘Do I want to work for someone that insecure?’ The answers no.

My sick record is impeccable, (apart from my recent shingles and hospitalisation.) I am conscientious, something that tends to come with age, and yes I have a wealth of experience should you wish to call on it. If not, I am quite happy to keep shtum.

But I find myself caught up in this world of competitiveness and insecurity, and to be honest I just cannot be arsed with it.

So now I find myself going into the New Year, not only without a job, but knowing I just don’t want the crap anymore. I do need to work, but only part time. Not just for the money, but also to use my brain, and my experience. Is anyone able to see the benefits that offers?

Is that not worth anything in this world today?

Mousy