Category Archives: Saying Goodbye

Taking A Moment: The Last Sunday Morning Snuggle in France

13 Sunday Dec 2020

Posted by in Change is a coming, For the live of dogs, Goodbyes, My home, new adventures, New Paths, poignancy, Saying Goodbye, Simple things, sunrises and sunsets, The continuing adventure

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December Sunrise Ambrieres les vallees 2020
Welshie moments

I often write this blog on a Sunday morning/afternoon as we sit in bed having our fourth cup of tea, snuggling with the Welshies. It is one of our treasured moments, a simple thing, counting our blessings.

We have been mega busy dismantling our home, and today will be the last Sunday that we will have the opportunity to do this in this home. The weather has lent itself kindly to us doing this given that the rain is pouring down, and every now and then a spurt of wind whips around this hose on the hill.

Once I get up my sparkling lights will be taken down, and off the bed.

Our Bedroom, a place of sanctuary

The 1860’s French dressing table will be emptied, ready for the remainder of our furniture to be moved on Tuesday.

Our Antique French Dressing Table lovingly painted by me.

This bedroom will no longer feel like ours, and this time next week we will be moving to a gite in anticipation of handing the keys to our house over the week after.

One of the lessons we have learned as part of this adventure is that we make our homes, it is RD and I who create them, and make them into places where people like to come, because they are welcomed.

I know I will create a new one, in some ways I am looking forward to it, but I started this blog all those years ago to encourage people to step outside of their comfort zones, to broaden their horizons, and to not be afraid of doing so. So I am writing about this move because yes, it is scary, yes it is poignant, yes you can recreate again, but yes you should live in each moment.

I asked RD the other day if he felt afraid, he said ‘Yes’.

Despite it all we know we are doing the right thing. Life has showed us that over and over. But right now we are procrastinating, or perhaps just treasuring this moment because we know it will never come again.

Rosie

December Sunset Montaigu Ambrieres les vallees 2020

Diary Of A Move: A Winter Move. What Fun!

07 Monday Dec 2020

Posted by in Change is a coming, new adventures, New Paths, Saying Goodbye, sunrises and sunsets, The continuing adventure

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A Memory From Christmas 2017

Normally at this time of year I would be doing my favourite Christmas thing: decorating my Christmas tree. But this year we’re dismantling our lives, so this one from 2017 will have to do. I chose it because it was the first time our son Tom came to visit us in France, and it was truly a magical time.

Christmas 2019

For us now Christmas isn’t about material things, it’s about the people, the simplicity and the memories we make. This year the memories will be vastly different from all others.

Our First Christmas in France 2015

We are on a countdown now, and I am not going to lie it is a little bit frightening, and trust me I chose that word carefully; because as we dismantle we know that we will not have our own place for some time, and those little voices can kick in and start whispering the ‘what if’s’. Over the years of living here and reading philosophy, psychology and the Tao I have become a lot better in closing them down, and mantras have become my saviours.

RD has been working so we have a limited amount of days we can clear out the two ton (sometimes seems like more) of crap we have accumulated in our lives, which involves many trips to the dechetterie (dump). Add to that the fact that the dechetterie is only open three half days and one full day a week and it all becomes ever so slightly desperate!

So on Saturday we had no choice: dechetterie it was! But the weather has turned decidedly cold here, and on that dictated day we also had the pleasure of freezing rain and sleet to contend with. There we were, in our fleeces and waterproofs, putting metal here, plastic there, electrical goods somewhere else, wood in one container, dirty wood in another container, whilst contending with the driving sleet in our faces. Let me tell you it was a joy! Luckily we had the dechetterie controller ‘Stig’, as he likes to be known (a la ‘Stig Of The Dump’) to help us. By the time we got home with the rain and snow still driving into our faces and soaked through despite the waterproofs, snd we decided to call it a day.

RD cleared out the cellar weeks ago, but he isn’t as definitive as me when it comes to making decisions to let things go, and asked me for help. I knew this meant that he wanted me to go with him and boss him around. So yesterday I did just that and the cellar was sorted into a pile for the dechetterie (yep here we go again) and the rest was loaded into the van and taken to our friends, who have kindly let us store our worldly goods in their outbuildings. It was all done in an hour. I am very methodical with things like that.

So having said that I have to go to pack up some more, and sort out our paperwork, which will be complicated because I need to ensure we have the basics to start our new life in Ireland, on our initial trip, because the rest will have to remain here until we can collect it in a few months time. We cannot take it all, not with two Welsh Terriers, and two cats, and clothes, food, and so much more, the van can only carry so much.

But before I go the cold weather has provided us (because I know my readers like them too) with some fabulous sunrises and sunsets. Here are some to enjoy…

Rosie

French Sunrise from my
garden December 2020
French Sunset from my Garden December 2020

Diary Of A Move: The Boat’s Booked

01 Tuesday Dec 2020

Posted by in Change is a coming, For the live of dogs, Friends, Goodbyes, Learning and Evolving, new adventures, New Paths, poignancy, Saying Goodbye, sunrises and sunsets, The continuing adventure

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November Sunrise over the French Vallees

Yesterday I booked our boat to Ireland. It’s no mean feat when your booking two Welsh terriers into heated dog lodges, arranging for two cats to remain safely and warmly in the van, and booking a cabin for yourselves for the eighteen and a half hour crossing!

It was weird because I felt very excited about going to Ireland, as did RD . But last night as we sat in our dismantled living room we both agreed that whilst excited we still felt a little sad. It’s part of the process folks, I have learned that now: part of the process of letting things go is to allow yourselves to feel the poignancy as one chapter of your life closes and another opens. We don’t always have to put our chins up and pretend that we’re not sad, or ignore our feelings and just look to the future (which we are incredibly excited about). I believe that we should allow that feeling of poignancy wash over us, and then keep going. Too many people try and have a ‘stiff upper lip’, when, really, they don’t need to. It’s just what it is.

Yesterday one of my best friends (thirty three years and counting) put a beautiful comment on my last post asking me to hug our house for her, because it had healed her at a time she needed it, just as it has healed us enough to go back into the ‘throng’. I have evolved from living here, so much so that I am ready to go back out there, albeit a different Rosie sometimes.

Making Our Home December 2015

Last night we took down my big decorative mirror that was one of the first things we hung above the fireplace. As RD carried it out he stopped and we both just looked at each other, remembering when we hung it in December 2015.

Moving on December 2020

As always life has shown me the way, you know how it does: like little pieces of jigsaw being placed like a path showing you where to go. (I have really learned to listen now.) We are juggling money, with each week mapped out as to what I have to pay. But when I spoke to the lovely lady at the cattery she doesn’t want the deposit until we arrive with the cats; and when I tried to pay for our accommodation in Ireland the money doesn’t come out until the 28th, freeing up enough money this week to book our boat. Moving from country to country is a complicated and expensive business. We were going to sail to Ireland on the 3rd of January 2021, but I couldn’t get the dogs booked into their dog lodges for that date, however I could get everything I needed for the 30th. Life clearly thought we should be starting the new year in a new country. So we will be as I write this we have twenty nine days left in France…….

Rosie

November Sunset From My French Home

Diary Of A Move: Dismantling The Home We Made.

29 Sunday Nov 2020

Posted by in Change is a coming, Goodbyes, Learning and Evolving, My family and other furry creatures, My home, new adventures, New Paths, poignancy, Saying Goodbye, sunrises and sunsets, The adventures of living life in the French countryside, The continuing adventure

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November Sunrise In Ambrieres les Vallees France

As you can probably tell I am trying to cherish every beautiful sunrise that I see. There are not many left here for me to cherish. I know there will be new ones, I am not sad about our decisions, but those new ones are not here yet, and I firmly remind myself to live in the here and now.

November Sunset in Ambrieres les Vallees France

When I find my new home I will put up a collections of the sunrises and sunsets that I have had the blessing to see whilst living here in France. It’s been a part of my life.

Life has took off now, we have less than three weeks left in this house. I have been packing for the last two weeks, and now every cupboard is empty apart from the stuff we’re using. The home we built is now being dismantled. I have held onto my sparkly lights until next week, just to feel as if we are still at home, but I know I will have to relinquish them eventually.

I have been mercenary, even selling our vintage Blue Willow plates, bowls and side plates, they are just not my thing, I prefer my plain white plates. It was only after I sold them that I realised that I had packed all our other plates and now we have no small plates or dinner plates, just platters! When I gave Daisy the cat some milk and cream she looked at me as if I had grown another head when I poured it out for her on a platter!

Our Beautiful Bedroom. I will create a new one. I always do.
Dismantling

The shelves are coming down, our antique French mirrors are packed away and my bedroom that I lovingly put together is slowly being dismantled, but I am still trying to hold on to my sparklies in every room for as long as I can.

Our beautiful French buffet is now in storage along with our armoire, both have already gained scratches but I knew that was coming. No stress they can always be repainted.

The fourteen mirrors we have throughout the house are coming down. The old grandfather clock has been taken to storage and when I woke this morning waiting for it to chime out the time, I suddenly remembered it was now chiming away in our friends summer house. I hope the mice appreciate it, and don’t feel the need to re-enact ‘Hickory Dickory Dock’!

Our furries are stressed to the max, the dogs are getting tetchy with each other, and the cats have finally started to snuggle together after being at odds for years. We feel really guilty about our animals, poor Wiglet looks afraid all the time after her terrible start in life, and we have to keep reassuring her that everything will be okay, that she is coming with us. Harley pretty much takes most things in his stride but even he is getting arsy with Wiglet.

I feel sad because I know they all love this garden, and because I know they will have to move again from our rental into whatever house we find; and God knows what condition that will be in. I do know that the first job will be to fence the garden to protect them all. Despite my guilt I know that part of our decision is based on finding regular work, because we have responsibilities to them, and I know that they will love Ireland just as much as they love here.

We know in our heart of hearts that we are doing the right thing for us all; and we also know that if you want an adventure part of it is discomfort, and apprehension, and poignancy. But we’ve done it once, we know we can do it again. This time we’re just letting more stuff go, and going into the future with our eyes open, using all we have learned from this adventure.

As I packed up this week it suddenly came to me that the last five years have all been about learning things to prepare us for our life in Ireland. We know that life is mapped out, we accepted that a long time ago.

Life’s all about learning and facing your fears ay?

Rosie

Sunsets from my French garden in France

New Horizons Are On Their Way

24 Tuesday Nov 2020

Posted by in Change is a coming, Goodbyes, My home, new adventures, New Paths, People, Saying Goodbye, sunrises and sunsets, The adventures of living life in the French countryside, The continuing adventure

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Sunrise in Ambrieres 24 November 2020

It’s official: we hand the keys over to the new owners of our house just before Christmas .

So Christmas as we know it is cancelled this year, no decorations (the one thing I love about Christmas). But there is a chance our son will come to visit with his friend so we will all be in a gite together, and it will be a an alternative Christmas, which will be good, not least because it will be different.

One of our lessons from living here has been to to simplify, to realise that we don’t need ‘stuff’ we just need good people around us. I read the linked post before I linked it, and it made me cry.

I have changed so much from this adventure, isn’t that what stepping outside of your comfort zone is about, to change and evolve?

So it’s busy, busy, busy. Rich is working I am packing up, and the poor animals are stressed to the max.

A new day is dawning…

Rosie

Today’s sunrise no wonder this house healed me …

Run Around Now

11 Wednesday Nov 2020

Posted by in Change is a coming, Goodbyes, My family and other furry creatures, My home, new adventures, New Paths, Saying Goodbye, sunrises and sunsets, The adventures of living life in the French countryside, The continuing adventure, Us

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So after a slow start we have all signed the Compromise de Vente. Our buyers have a cooling off period but despite this they have paid their ten per cent deposit and paid to expedite the process, so it’s looking promising. It looks as if we will be leaving our home just after Christmas, if not before. Christmas is cancelled in our house.

We had started weeks ago with regard to getting the house ready to pack, including sorting the barn…

Yep! Why?

We have been clearing out cupboards, being really mercenary with letting things go. We have learned from this adventure that you have to let go to move forward. Despite knowing this I find we have to constantly remind ourselves. So due to this I am offering my son’s beautiful cherrywood cot, that turns into a bed, for free on a giveaway site. He’s 31, I think it’s time to let it go.

On Sunday we gave away his chess set and superhero figures to our neighbours little boy. I know why I bought them over here, I have realised that ‘letting go’ is a gradual process that, if we embrace change, happens over time. I loved my old house, it was the house where my son left home from, it was a beautiful house, and I couldn’t let it all go at once. But as we learn that change brings new things into our lives, so we let go to allow room.

There is a lot to do, and RD will be working for 3 to 4 weeks of the time left. So today we got up full of good intentions, despite both of us having a bad nights sleep, to crack on with clearing the goats shed, and the cellar. But I knew that we needed to plan this huge move, and the planning had to start from today, with everything to consider: money, the process, the order of things that needed to be done, and not least in the mix were our beloved animals. They have to be jabbed: the cats to enable them to go into the cattery at least 3 days before the actual move, and they and the Welshies need to have rabies jabs at least 22 days before the move.

We had to think are we taking the cats on the boat, for twenty hours, or fly them out to us. This would mean leaving them for up to eight weeks in a cattery, and I don’t want to spend a thousand euros on that. As part of our discussions we also both said we don’t want to leave them in France when we are not here. The decision has been made, they’re coming with us.

That led onto the discussion as to room in the van, leading on to ‘do we leave our stuff over here for months, or make arrangements to collect it sooner rather than later?’

To make all these decisions we had to contact the vets for prices for the inoculations, and a storage facility in Ireland, who acted like I was mad when I asked if he required a deposit, saying very kindly ‘Oh I don’t think there’s any need for that.’ We had to look up boats and what facilities they offer for our beloved furries, and so much more.

We need to find somewhere to stay for the ten days after the move, in France we have to leave the house at least 2 days before the sale goes through, because the house has to be clean, tidy and all blemishes and marks have to be made good. It’s all part of selling your house over here. On the day we all sign the final ‘Acte de Vente’ we hand the keys over there and then. There is no going back.

I wondered if we all pontificate when it comes to moving, because of that fear of change. I think we do.

So six hours after starting planning the day was nearly gone, but the plans have been mapped out on paper, decisions have been made and tomorrow we get up at 7! Hopefully I will get a wonderful sunrise to share.

Rosie

Living In The Moment: sunny Autumn Days

23 Friday Oct 2020

Posted by in For the live of dogs, My home, poignancy, Reflections, Saying Goodbye, Simple things, The adventures of living life in the French countryside, The continuing adventure, The seasons

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I have made myself a promise, in this insane world, to give myself a little silence every day.

Here in France it is a beautiful autumn day, the sun is bright and warm, with just the occasional cloud blowing by.

So I took the time, from my what can be stressful days at the moment, and I had my tea and toast outside with the Welshies.

As I sat listening to the birds singing, and the trees sighing with resignation as the breeze took more of their leaves from them, I thought back to my first autumn here. I can remember how I would stand by my washing line and look around me in amazement that I owned the land where the huge oak trees loomed over me, and the crab apple dropped her apples loudly onto the goat shed roof. I remember walking up the chemin that was covered with a carpet of acorns and cob nuts crunching underfoot, and thinking this is mine.

But it was never mine, I never owned it, I borrowed it when I needed to heal, and it did it’s job. Now it’s time to let it go, and let someone else sit as the leaves blow by. Let someone else look down in wonder at the carpet of walnuts hiding amongst the leaves. Most years there are well over three thousand, we have given up trying to pick them all up, and we giggled the other day when we took the dogs for a walk down the lane and realised we were following a trail of walnut shells left by the squirrels. .

I will ask my neighbours if they want to collect some. If not the squirrels will be fed for the winter.

I will never tire of this view.

But one of my lessons has been it’s a view, that’s all. There will be more views.

Rosie