Time is flying by, and these three are keeping us busy. I have been meaning to blog for ages but I literally have not had the time. Puppies are hard work, getting two in the middle of winter is double the hard work. Not only can you not let them out, or leave the door open; in our case our garden was not small puppy ready. (Oh Elfie you were such an easy puppy. Although we didn’t think so at the time.!)

As all bungalows do we have a garden that encircles the bungalow all bar one side. With my pretty courtyard….

And our driveway. But as a lot of you know we also have half an acre paddock which is not secure for teeny tiny puppies. Add to that they are too small to be out there, and Elfie, a puppy herself, gets so excited she would run them over playing. Only problem is she weighs 24 kilo and at their size it would be the equivalent of being hit by an an express train. So we have to be measured in how we introduce the puppies to their garden.

First we bought some moveable fence panels and made them a pound in the back of the garden, basically giving them run of the courtyard. My courtyard now looks like a war zone! They dug up six of my plants, holes in the grass, chewed up plants and totally destroyed one of the hanging baskets that had been blown down by the wind. This is not working we thought, as we made our way across the quagmire of mud to the garage.

So we moved the portable fencing to the front of the house. This meant we had to use the back door to get out of the house and our house from the road looked like a skanks house. All we had to add was a car with no wheels up on bricks and the look would have been complete. (Although my sparkly lights in the window may have redeemed us.)

The second night we let them, out and when RD went to collect them they had actually pushed the wire panelling out of the fence panel, and we’re running around in gay abandon. Luckily they had not gone up onto the paddock because it was dark, and with with Elfie’s help (she is an Angel in black) we managed to catch them. But there we were, yet again, running around after our dogs in the dark in our pyjamas. I had a severe case of deja vu!

We thought that by putting the puppies, or ‘the destructors’ as they have come to be known, on a tarmac drive they could do little damage until we fenced off the paddock. (You remember the paddock where we knocked the wall down, well now we were going to fence it off! With tasteful fencing, that we could see through, but more to come of that.) Well how wrong we were. They dug a hole under the bungalow! I kid you not. They also dug a few holes in the tarmac on the drive!

In their defence they are now nearly six months old, and they were going a little stir crazy. It didn’t help that Elfie would stand on the other side of the fence and run up and down and into the paddock, just to wind them up!

Getting out of the house was like a military manoeuvre, making sure they were shut in the living room before you walked up the stupid corridor of the hall to the back door. But one day, for me, disaster struck. Working from home I opened the back door to let Elfie in and the living room door blew open as it was not shut properly. They were out like Jack rabbits, hares set free at Springtime, and they were off like the wind. Elfie had gone through the one hole we have left in our fencing RD has not blocked up, into the farmers field, and they were out there with her. I just stood there, in the paddock, and thought ‘what the fuck do I do now?’ Elfie realised the danger and came back into the garden, knowing they would follow her, and a merry chase ensued, which involved me hobbling round the paddock after two puppies who had found freedom after a long winter in captivity. You can imagine! How I caught them I do not know but Elfie lured Pixie into the garage and I managed to grab her, after Luna had been safely captured.

During the whole time I was chasing them I had put myself on a toilet break from work. I had to explain to my manager that I had not been stuck in the toilet all that time. He found it highly amusing, I was still struggling for breath!

So the time came to put our fencing up, after much cost, and RD was proud of his work. On Sunday we did the great unveiling and let the puppies out, into freedom. They ran straight through the gaps in the fence and out into the paddock. ‘Bastards!’ RD said.. ‘Oh well’ I thought, at least I have RD with me to catch them.

Half an hour later we put them back in, blocked up the hole they had gone through, and released them again. Doh! They could get through every gap, and off they went again……. Elfie looked at us as if to say ‘Why the fuck have you let them out again?’ As she went off in hot pursuit to help us round them up. And there we were again , the Mad Anglaise , running around in howling wind and rain after our dogs.

That evening as we sat in dry jymbies (pyjamas) we cried with laughter as we watched the video of there first release, when I said ‘she’s out Rich, she’s out.’ Followed by RD saying ‘So is the other one, little bastard’ with an air of resignation. Then I said ‘They’ll come back, they’ll come back.’……..That bit made us laugh most of all.

So on Sunday poor RD spent five hours on his knees covering the fencing with wire mesh.,

The puppies are now free….And where are they? Asleep beside me in front of the fire.

You can see why my hands have been full!

Rosie