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Tag Archives: writing

Another gate opens, another ship sales from dock, and the crew is getting bigger all the time

14 Thursday Jun 2018

Posted by in Change is a coming, Friends, People, Reflections, The background story, The continuing adventure

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When I first started this blog, I chose the tag-line carefully….

I said in my intro to this blog that I was writing it for all the people who were wondering ‘What if?’ Or, like us, were thinking that there must be more to life than this – and not necessarily material things. who were thinking about making change, about people who were thinking about stepping off the path that we are all led to believe we should follow, and going off into the woods to see what life may hold.

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I have written about serendipity, one of my most favourite words, and something I believe in: A series of events that we were not looking for that add up to make something wonderful.

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I have written about our mini-bus of life, and asked who is on your mini-bus, how many people do you allow on your bus, give them a seat only for them to try and  influence you  to do what they think you should do, often because they want to feel safe in numbers, and need to know what they are doing is right?

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How often? When, in fact, you should not let them influence you at all. How many people have told you that your mad? That you need to keep doing what you are doing even if it is clearly killing you?

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I have had people contact me from all over the world to tell me that I have made them think. Not least when I share my experiences with regard to mental health (I am not going to call them issues, they are not issues they are just another part of the body that sometimes find’s it hard to work with all the shit we are bombarded with!!) Some of those people have made me cry, to know that my words have resonated with them. Some have made me smile when they start to make change.

I have made people laugh and I have made people cry, but most importantly for me I have inspired people. Not least our friend Karen:

I share her blog often, Dylan’s Welshie World. It is a blog about her puppy and her antics, but it is not just a blog about that, it is a blog about how that puppy has changed Karen’s life, how Karen has stepped off that cliff (or fell off! As she said the other day!) at a time when she needed the love that, sometimes, only a dog can bring.

You should read her story it is a young blog , but it will make you laugh out loud and make some others who have been on the hamster wheel for so long ask themselves if they need to make that change too. Karen has been brave, she had to overcome the worry of opening up to the world – but the response she had has been life affirming.

So I have inspired Karen, she has set up her blog after years as a high-flying editor she went back to writing, doubted herself because it had been so long,  until I convinced her and now her blog has become a hit and she is receiving high praise for her writing. – See, she just had to believe and have someone believe in her, of course she could write!! The things we come to believe!! Because we listen to that spin doctor in our head!

A series of events led Karen and I to being back in touch and closer than ever; sadly Karen’s dear mum died, her last remaining brother died a short time after, and, as death does, it started Karen on a path to looking at her life and the career that had defined her. Then a person who she had known for many years and got back in touch with showed that they were not the person that she thought they were all along, and left her at a time when her life was in upheaval. Just as that happened we got back in touch, I had sold a story to one of the Magazines that Karen edited, and, although we had seen each other over the years, I came back into her life at a time when she needed someone who would listen, had been through something similar, and would tell her the truth. In addition my husband makes her laugh all the time, and she needed that.

So Karen came over to see us, fell in love with our dogs (who couldn’t)….

 

Karen returned home with the firm intention of finding a Welsh Terrier puppy. They are hard to get, and there is normally an eighteen month waiting list, but serendipity clearly had a plan for Karen, and she rang a breeder who had just had a little girl puppy rejected because she had a kink in her tail. The breeder  liked Karen, liked the way she talked about the breed and just knew that, although others were waiting, Karen would love this Welshie with all her heart, and she does.

In the September Dyls came home to live with Karen, and the rest, as they say is history…

As Karen came over more and more and fell in love with the serenity of France, it made her think about her life again. No least watching Dylan run free around our garden like a mad thing helped her decide to come to France and spend the summer here and see where life takes her – she is starting to understand that she is not doing the driving!!

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So  today Karen packed up the car with the final bits and bobs, and she is now in France, with Dylan, and on her way to our house. On Saturday she collects the keys for her rental and she will be over here for at least two months, maybe more, who knows what we will find in our house hunt.

We have a new member of our family, two in fact, and she helps me in the same way as I help her. We are both straight talkers, and so alike, whoever is driving this bus knows what they are doing!! Not only that Karen loves my husband and his mix of madness, and vulnerability at times.

But it does not end there…. In August Jen, another old friend who we have all got close to again over the past year, is coming over for another adventure, travelling on her own, something she has not done for some time! Who knows where life will lead her; and then there is my other dear friend Mary, who has been inspired to sell her home in Herne Bay and go to pastures new in the countryside of England and take that chance. She says I have inspired her, and for that I am truly honored.

So over these last three years, I have read the Tao, learnt to let my ego go, to still be kind (even to arseholes! Oops!).

I have learnt to unlearn all that I had learnt – that material things are not important, and often make you unhappier, to not plan way in advance – you only have this moment that is all you are guaranteed; I have learnt to laugh in the face of adversity, to know that you can survive even when that spin doctor tells you that you can’t. Of course you can you wake up tomorrow and you are still alive! I know the people that count are sitting on my mini-bus and that all the others, whilst of course allowed to have an opinion, are not the ones whose opinions count where I am concerned.

I am thankful every day.

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I have read others stories as part of my book research, and my heart has broken all over again for those people, and I have learnt to just be me, and happy in my own skin.

But most importantly I have learnt that I can touch people with my words, from all over the world. Whilst it is an honor to be in the top twenty expat blogs in France, it is the people who I inspire who make me want to do more and more. For that I thank you all…..

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Moisy

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Older and wiser (I hope!)

31 Wednesday Jan 2018

Posted by in Reflections, The continuing adventure

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The Mayenne River at twilight

So it is official I have now completed my 55th year on this earth; and because I know I am such a different person  I thought that I would take some time to look back on the last year and share with you the things that have caused me to change, and make my life so much better in so many ways.

The first decision I made was way back in January, it was to stop looking at the group social media pages for this immediate surrounding area! I found them so negative, nasty, viscous and controlling and I just decided that I didn’t need that shit in my life anymore.

Now I was going to say more but have decided that this topic probably needs a post all on it’s own so look out for that one; all I will say is that my life was infinitely better after I stopped engaging or looking at them.

I really started to understand the Tao, and now follow my life pretty much in that way – although I do have to constantly remind myself every day to not get caught up in unnecessary crap. Due to this I have been accused  of becoming a religious nut! Of having ‘found God’ when really, for me, the Tao is a philosophy not a religion: a theory or attitude that acts as a guiding principle for behaviour. That is what it has done for me it has helped me to follow principles for my behaviour and also where others are concerned it has enabled me to make choices about whether I want their behaviour in my life, or whether I am going to let it affect my life.

In fact folks if you read the Tao I would ask everyone what is God? For me it is just a label that can be used to define something, nothing more, nothing less.

Now, I don’t do negative in all aspects of my life – and when I find myself in the company of negative people I feel like I am  in the company Dementors (to borrow from the wonderful J.K Rowling)  sucking the life out of me.

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You must have been there, with someone who just moans and moans and everything that comes out of their mouth is negative; and eventually it is like having  your soul sucked out of you, you come away feeling so down and questioning everything you do and everything in life. This lesson really came to the fore for me in the summer when my darling husband really let a negative person get to him, he was in their company for some time and eventually he really did feel like hanging himself from a tree!! (I kid you not read my post a birthday wobble.)

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So after this I started to notice the negative people who were around us, people who only wanted to criticise, and when you actually listened to them not a good thing came out of their mouth – or sometimes it would when they realised that they had overstepped the mark. Too late for me I’m afraid. I step away now.

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I mean lets us not forget, as I blogged earlier in the year,  I was actually told I was too positive!!! WTF!!!

So I distanced myself from the negative people and boy am I happier and in a better place now – good things are coming my way.

 

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As some of you may know (from my post a little bit more about me) I don’t do confrontation either. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t give people crap and I don’t put up with crap from them; the difference now is that I don’t get angry, I stay cool, calm and collected but I still say ‘no’ if I need to.

It has been interesting for me this year where this is concerned, because I have encountered people who knew what had happened to me, knew that I have the Incredible Hulk inside me, and it was as if they wanted to press my buttons to bring it out. They seemed to assume that because I did not lose my temper I was weak and a pushover.

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Those who know me well, and probably some of you that read this blog, will giggle at that thought because it is so untrue. In addition they would not want the Incredible Hulk inside me to come out because then they would be hurt, and I would be tired for weeks, feel awful and may possibly have been arrested!

Luckily I am now able to step away, or calmly ask questions for clarification -which they don’t want to give because they would have to acknowledge they were arseholes – and that tends to sort the situation out.

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I have learnt over the year not to ask others for explanations and not to offer  explanations to others. I don’t expect explanations and when people expect them of me I now ask them why? Ego perhaps!!

The reason for this is because when people expect and explanation from you is this because they seem to think that you should care what they think?

There are some people that I know and love and  I do care what they think. But those people never seem to ask me for explanations. By giving explanations you are allowing others to live your life for you, and that is, quite simply, not my thing honey! If you are not on my mini-bus of life then I offer no explanations.  (For those new to my blog you may want to read the post – so who is on your mini-bus of life.)

So I don’t care what most people think and that has worked out brilliantly for me as a writer because if I did I would write absolutely nothing!! As one of my beloved readers from this blog told me ‘It’s all copy!!’

That brings me to one of the other big things I learnt and that is to  write what I want. My book – people will be shocked I have shared!! My blog who wants to read about where I went in France all the time! It seems to have worked my followers are now near 300 and rising every day with well over fifty hits a day. Thank you and welcome keep the ball rolling.

I have learnt who the important people are in my life, and what is important to me where people are concerned. I have also learnt to look at myself and how I react to others, and to let the past go and deal with the relationship now. Everyone is different and I just go with the flow – unless you are insecure or negative, sorry but they are a no no for me I find that insecure people tend to bring others down and I don’t need that. I wish them well, hope that they find their way and if they do and they want to reconnect always happy to.

 

And one of the most important things: My mini bus has driven along the road and picked back up some good friends that I had lost contact with along the way in life- We have all learnt things during the time we have been absent from each others lives and we have come to realise that there are some people who you cannot let go of , because when they come back into your life they are on the same page as you – they just took a different route to get there; and I have found we are all infinitely wiser for the journeys we have had.

Not least in that is my son, who has found his way in life and is flying high because by taking this adventure we pushed him off the cliff and trusted that he would be caught; just like we have. You have to believe, trust me.

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So here is to the next year of my life, I feel already that it is going to be a good one – ever positive me!!!

If you like my blog please share folks I am loving the new people joining from all over the world.

Quote ona adventures and good energy

Moisy

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And so the New Year is here with premonitions, omen’s and belief.

05 Friday Jan 2018

Posted by in Reflections, The continuing adventure

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I always love this time of year. It is something New, in fact the biggest new thing we will get this year, a New Year!!!  A time to reflect, and consider a way forward, perhaps a new way forward, an opportunity to change your life in fact. The opportunity is always there if you want it.

I started this post over two days ago, but just got caught up in other things, mainly some research for my book;  because, although it is written, I thought I would read some blogs about the topic I have written about. Other people’s stories that are similar to my own. But you see my book is about ‘our’ story, it is not just ‘my’ story, and as I have researched I can only find blogs on the singular and not the plural perspective; and I realised that there is, still, nothing out there like ‘our story.’

What does this have to do with the New Year? This is the year that I am going to make change, I AM going to publish my work, and I AM going to help others with regard to the topic of my book, and I AM going to make change for Rich and I.

I have had a strong premonition, picture really, in my head of our house with a new front door (sadly I cannot save the one we have, she is too far gone and is now on ‘death row’.)

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It will be a double glazed UPVC because, do you know what? I have come to realise that sometimes we just have to be realistic with regard to what we need to live out here; especially when living on the pinnacle of a hill with the wind and the rain lashing our poor house at every turn. (It has been a wet winter, so we have a very mouldy house!)

I also have a strong picture of Rich and I being in a better position by the end of the year, I don’t know why but it really is so strong that I am going to go with it.

For me there have been a few omens:

The New Year literally blew in and blew the other one right out  But the tarp on the roof held firm and despite a small leak over Christmas (it is what it is!) there were no leaks no matter how hard the wind blew.

I took the puppies for a walk in the hooley because I love the way the wind seems to blow all of the cobwebs from your brain, and I looked around at all the shoots and the beautiful green hills, and I thought let it blow, just let it blow because it is all part of nature and I love being surrounded by it at every turn.

I noticed that Spring is  on it’s way, the fields are already green and there are shoots appearing on my clematis, even though I planned to cut them back hard in January; I still need to do that!  There are catkins are on the trees,  and the little fluffy boots on my willow tree are starting to come through. Another reminder that things continue on whether we want them to or not, and we just have to go with the flow.

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But it has also reminded me that life is passing so quickly, we are five days into the year now! And I need to stop pontificating and just do it, make some slight changes to my book and send it to some more publishers.

In addition I picked up a couple of other blogs that are about the same topic as my book, it was as if they were sent to me to help me realise that I really do need to get my book out there. My heart goes out to the people who are struggling as I was.

And then, today, a weird thing happened: long ago I signed up to a dictionary site and they had sent me the meaning of my name! It was the word of the day. How weird is that?

Now I always thought that my name, Moira,  was a Celtic name, because my dad was Irish, and I believed that it came from Maire, which means Mary, and also drop of the sea.

But today I learnt that it actually derives from Greece and is, in fact, another name for ‘The Fates’, the white robed figures in Greek mythology that represent Destiny. Most people who read my blog will know that I do believe in fate, that someone else is doing the driving where life is concerned (The mini bus of life) and that Serendipity is my favourite word (Oh Serendipity! My beloved friend.) So to find out that I am actually named after ‘The Fates’, for me is a really strong message, that this year my fate will change – in a positive way. That the New Year is bringing with it  a message – ‘Change your fate girl, and believe in yourself, because that person who is doing the driving is trying to tell you something!’ If I am named after Fate then surely I can now change my own!

So I sit here now, starting a days writing with my blog because it always gets the juices flowing. I am surrounded by  furry writing companions, both of who I am blessed to have with me, Molly Kitten being eighteen this year, and Harley who as you know from my blog almost died in December but who is here with me today; what wonderful companions to have!

I am writing this post because if we had not chosen to have this adventure, to jump of that cliff! And if I still lived my life in England, I would be going to a job I hated today, I would have my heating on even if it was not cold, I would be caught up on the Hamster wheel and probably be stopping at a shop to buy something that I didn’t need on the way home to make myself feel better. I would go home to my beautiful house (surrounded by houses and people) and I would get stressed on the drive home. I would not try to write my book because, although not happy with my life, I would tell myself I was content because I was warm, and had regular income, and forget that I was not free to be me.

Instead I have time to look things up, do research, do my writing, look out at my window at this….

 

I have my big socks and slippers on and I don’t have the fire alight yet because instead I am wearing my fleece. I don’t have secure income but I do have security in my belief that if I let it go what I need will come my way, and it has not been wrong yet. We only have two months of the winter left and we have survived so far without putting up with crap from people that we should be putting up with crap from. Yes I have mould on my walls, which I wash off!! It doesn’t kill me, but my old life was!

And now I am in a position where my book is written, I know that I have to believe because changing my life and going on this adventure has proved to me that if you believe you CAN make it work. No, it won’t be the same as it was in my old life, but I don’t want it to be; otherwise what would be the point of an adventure?!!

Hope that this year holds good things for you all too, but they may not be what you think they are going to be…..

If you like my blog please share it, I was thrilled to get nearly three hundred views on my last post – wonderful and thank you all….

 

Moisy

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