Tag Archives: Belief

Understanding yourself: Me

04 Friday Oct 2019

Posted by in Dream, Reflections, The continuing adventure, Us

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I have shared on this blog that the year before we came out here I stood on the precipice of having a full breakdown, and I did have a mini one. I have written about how I can be driven, which in some ways is a good thing and essential, (more of that in another post) and yes, being that type of person is a blessing. But it can also be a curse, when insecurity creeps in through the crack in the open door.

Without my strong personality my book would not be out there, and my Blog would not have been so successful, but more than that so many people would not have found something to give them hope in their hour of need.

But despite that I also remember my counsellors words well when she told me I was a ‘doer’, and that if I didn’t learn to utilise, but control, that part of my personality it could actually destroy me.

Living here has been hard in that I now have arthritis and work is limited for me; because I cannot do the things I used to do; and you see for someone like me to not be able to have something to focus on means that I feel as if I have lost myself. I have always needed something to define me: in the UK it was my career, which virtually destroyed me, but coming here and trying to find something else proved difficult.

But last year life shook me up and showed me the way: I started the Other blog and it took off. I always knew that sharing our story would help others, and now I know it has. As I have written in previous posts it jolted me back to being me, it gave me impetus, and all the things I have worked on: H’s website for the business, the Facebook page, and the business itself, which is doing better than it ever has, was as a result of me finding my impetus again; or as I have said: being driven. The blog reached 96,000 views in a year and I was in control of what I was doing: which is something I love.

But once the book was published the control was taken away from me to a degree. Yes I could promote it, increase my media presence, but I would never actually know any stats for how well the book was doing until the royalty cheque fell on the mat; and that for me was a problem. It was what was keeping me awake at the beginning of the week; I had to relinquish some of the control, and I had to trust the fact that someone else was now doing the driving. I knew it, I knew it was going to be the case but my brain remained active and kept me awake because I couldn’t control it.

I still keep a journal, as I have written on the other blog my journal was at one point the book that saved my life, but I don’t write in it often now, the two blogs tend to work for me. But as I have said they are still not the same as keeping a journal, which is a place where you don’t worry about your audience, because your audience is you, and so you have to be honest.

After my last post I knew that I had to write my journal, that was the key to sleeping. So I did: I had a frank conversation with myself: that the blog had and still is, doing so well why would the book fail? I reminded myself of all the comments I have received from all over the world:

‘Thanks for your amazing insight it helps me to understand how to stay strong through all of this.’

‘This! I need to read this today!’

‘When I am having a hard day sometimes I go back to Rosie’s blog, and it helps me get my demon under control.’

I told myself that I need to have a little more belief in myself, and I was honest with myself that at times I doubt myself and I questioned why. I wrote about the power of belief, but despite that when things are out of our control our belief begins to falter, and the strength is in pulling ourselves back up, and holding on.

On Wednesday night I slept soundly. I have always wanted to be able to meditate, but have struggled. So when I recently read a post from the Fabulous Biscuit factory blog I realised that writing my journal is a form of meditation for me. I put my pen to paper and I just write, and then I read what I have written and my mind is clear.

So in knowing that life shows us the way yesterday I found my book for sale in Waterstones, and stocked in Gardners. I knew that meant that the book was doing well, and it helped me a great deal, I also knew that life was telling me to hold on to my belief which was confirmed when we met a new client with the business last night: they work in the book world and when I said that the book is stocked in Gardners they advised that before that could have happened Gardners would have done their homework: they only stock books that they think will sell!

So I will do all the hard work I need to and support and promote my book, (of course I will) but I will give myself a timeframe every day, and some days I will step back from it. After all someone else is doing the driving! I know that!

Rosie

Belief – Just have faith and believe

21 Saturday Sep 2019

Posted by in Change is a coming, Dream, Making our own way, Reflections, The continuing adventure, Us

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I am now reading, we are now reading, ‘The Book of Awakening’ by Mark Nepo. There are many passages that have been highlighted for reference not least ‘The Spoked Wheel’; in fact that made me cry; but that is for another post. Today I want to say about belief, in fact will probably post a few posts about belief in the future.

From the book of awakening by Mark Nepo…

‘January 11

Ted Shawn

Underneath all we are taught, there is a voice that calls to us beyond what is reasonable, and in listening to that flicker of spirit, we often find deep healing. This is the voice of embodiment calling us to live our lives like sheet music played…’

For me this whole passage was about belief. If we had not moved to France, and I had not had the time and the solitude to research and interact with others, I would not have written this book. I would have had the n’er do wells surrounding me and I would have struggled to have got off that wheel and hold on to my belief.

I had another post lined up for this week, but life as always has taken over and showed me the way and on Monday I was called and told my book had gone to publication. On Thursday this arrived.

After nearly four years of hard work, writing and re-writing my book, to hold it in my hand is something I cannot describe and it made me cry.

Within an hour people were messaging asking where they could buy it. I was about to reply and say that it was not available on Amazon or Barnes & Noble yet, but just thought I would check; and there it was! I cried again.

I cannot believe it. But why can’t I. At the end of the day I wrote my book in the belief that it would help others, and my blog (93,000 views and counting) and the comments and messages I receive proved that my belief was right.

I have experienced so often the ‘oh you’re writing a book (in the tone that implies that they should follow it up with ‘ of course you are’), or been asked why, or told you won’t earn any money from that, and so on. But I never gave up.

Our’s is a story that helps others in what often is the most traumatic time of their life. So it was never just about earning money, it was about helping others, it was about perseverance, and it was about not following the crowd. Ultimately it was all about ‘Belief’: it’s all about belief and never giving up.

So now it’s out there and I hope some of you will enjoy reading it.

Thanks for reading, this is part of my French adventure after all. I couldn’t have done it without living here.

Rosie

Making This Better is available internationally on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Xlibris in both paperback & ebook.

Making This Better the book is now available including the journal entries for the first 5 years of our recovery & the whole 21 days of ‘The War’. Available internationally in paperback and ebook  at Amazon and Barnes & Noble also available at Xlibris and Apple Books for iPad and Waterstones Bookstores for click & collect

I would love to hear your feedback.

 

I’m back! You can’t keep me down for long.’

18 Tuesday Dec 2018

Posted by in My family and other furry creatures, My home, People, The continuing adventure

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Someone said to me on Saturday that she had missed my blogs recently; and guessed after my last blog that I was,perhaps, struggling with life out here; but that she hoped not because I gave her hope.

I wasn’t necessarily struggling with life out here, I was struggling with my belief that life would show me the way, and that despite all the crap good would come.

If you’ve been reading my blog you know I follow the teachings and philosophy of the Tao; I know that where there’s bad there’s good, and where there’s good there’s bad; that you may have a lot of crap come your way but if you hold onto your faith good will come; and things over the past few months were making that hard, I was struggling to believe.

But over the past few weeks so many people have supported me, helped us, and they gave me hope: my sister sent me a medicated mouthwash and mouth gel, my friend Saveena called to say the assessor was coming out for the roof, and both she and my sister contacted me almost daily to check I was okay. It all helped but I still struggled.

So on Thursday I looked up and asked for help to regain my belief; because I knew that good things would not come if I could not believe. An hour later my IPad pinged and what I needed started to come my way. By Friday my faith was back; and I started to see ALL My blessings: good friends, new friends, our son, our family, our animals, the stunning place where we live, and not least our love for each other.

I had worked hard all week creating pretty Christmas stock to sell at a craft fair on Saturday at a beautiful old French Mill half an hour from us.

But when Saturday came it was minus six degrees and thick ice, with icicles were hanging off our garden table, and when Rich wound down his window there was another window of ice in its place! The roads were treacherous. But we trundled on, with the van skidding everywhere in the sleet, and set up our stall.

Sadly in the end, and understandably given the weather, only about ten people visited the fair. But we still had a wonderful day. We met two lovely, kind people. They too were doing what they could to keep their dream alive, and we laughed all day. They had spent all summer making these wonderful reindeer and you can find them on Facebook as la petit Cretouffiere.

At the end of the day we all gave each other something: cakes, key rings, angels, chocolates,

And my dear, kind friend gave me this stunning lamp, which now takes pride of place on our stairs (walls to be decorated next year!) projecting stars all over the stairwell

Stars are a big thing in my house, a star is for life not just for Christmas! So I decided to keep my newest design for me – twinkle, twinkle! It now takes pride of place in my bedroom, twinkling in the twinkly lights…

It can be replicated if required by anyone…

At the end of the day we all helped each other load up and tidy before the night drew in. We got home to a freezing house (gotta love that stone!) that took three hours to warm up! But we changed into layers of fleecy pyjamas, Snuggly socks (two pairs!) opened the wine and watched the Strictly Come Dancing final; with a roaring fire, four sleepy cats, and two snuggled Welshies.

I know that we are blessed, we have each other, and we fought tooth and nail to keep that; no money in the world can buy what we have. We have no presents (but the dogs have one) and we don’t need them. Our Christmas present will be snuggling in bed with a cup of tea on Christmas morning, and eating our dinner on our laps, not caught up in all the hype! My happiness is complete with our Christmas decorations, that I have collected over the years.

We have now been invited to various shin digs and I am busy. This morning I woke up to this stunning sunrise and I thought to myself ‘all I had to do was believe.’

And I do, my belief is strong, nothing can take that away, it may wane but it will never leave me.

I’m back!

Moisy

You may want to read my other blog

https://makingthisbetter.com

Doesn’t matter where you live you just accept things as they are..

06 Tuesday Nov 2018

Posted by in My home, Reflections, The seasons

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Here is a blog that I wrote last week, and forgot to share with you – sorry about that folks! I would welcome comments on this one….

Since the chilly temperatures last weekend the weather had now become weirdly very warm, and ever so slightly wet. Last year we had the wettest winter ever recorded in France and it can get very grey, very fast over here, which I know gets some people down.

As I look out of my window from where I write there is drizzle in the air and a feeling of dampness everywhere. The Welshie’s are snuggled and asleep and I have lit the fire early today. (I count that as a blessing as we have enough wood to not worry when we light it – for the first time in three years.)

Grey is my favourite colour, most of my house is painted one shade or another of it, and I often sit up here on the hill alone, whilst Rich and my neighbours are at work. It would be quite easy to feel isolated but I don’t. I am someone who likes her own company, I am busy with my two blogs now, and I am writing for hours every day to hone my book because come hell or high water it will be published – with another month heading to the eight thousand views scenario I would be mad not to believe in it.

I do a lot of reading as part of my research, and today I read a post where it said that it was okay to feel down and it got me thinking (which I am blessed to have time to do whilst living on this French hill) am I too positive?

I have blogged in the past about how someone told me that I was – but then she was a person who never seemed happy in her life, no matter what it gave her, and had often suffered from depression.

So can you be too positive? I know from reading the Tao that where there is good there is bad and where there is bad there is good, and perhaps it is that thought that keeps me going through the bad times, that I know that if I believe eventually good will come my way – in whatever form as long as I believe it. I also know that we continously focus on the negative only negative crap will come our way because we are attracting it. But do I not see the negative shit? Or am I now able (after reading the Tao) to just accept the fact that it is ‘just life’?

Let’s look at our roof scenario – it had major damage from a storm in the March of 2016, and then the insurance company refused to pay out. At that time I had lived here a year and yes I was stressed about it. Wondered how we would survive, berated the world for sending crap our way, and it just seemed as if we couldn’t get a break. Then two months later I started to read the philosophy of the Tao (The book was called ‘Change Your thoughts, Change Your Life) and it did change my life. When I first started reading it I wondered what the hell it was talking about, but I perservered and now I get it; but boy did it take time!

In the September a tornado ripped through our garden tearing the silver birch tree in half and finishing off the roof. As you know if you read this blog we had only a tarp that kept us for the elements and we had that tarp for another two years.

But here is the rub: I had learnt that to worry about it was not going to change it. We didn’t have the money to get it done, the water was going to come in but I had to accept that there was nothing I could do until the opportunity arose to fix it. Yes it could have got into the electrics – but it didn’t – yes it could have rotted the rafters – but it didn’t (well not completely) but what was me worrying about it, or being fed up about it going to achieve? Nothing!

I learnt that when the time was right we would get the new roof we needed and we have, we still carried on living here, we did not die! The same as with the water, I learnt from that lesson never to waste water or take it for granted again.

As the years  have gone on I have learnt that worrying and stressing will get me nowhere, and I just have to accept what life dishes out to me, and go with the flow.

Where there is good there is bad and where there is bad there is good. If I don’t know the bad then I won’t know the good.

So am I too positive?

Moisy

Being positive joke

Cloud Watching – Believe,

06 Tuesday Nov 2018

Posted by in My family and other furry creatures, My home, The adventures of living life in the French countryside, The continuing adventure, The seasons

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It was cold over the weekend and although we had decided to have a bonfire in line with the traditional bonfire night in England (November the 5th folks, when Guy Fawkes, who was a Spaniard (are you keeping up?) was found guarding a huge amount of gunpowder under the houses of parliament and hung drawn and quartered for his sins, even though he was not the main conspirator. So as we English do we celebrate this gory event with bonfires and fireworks – I know we’re weird!) Anyway back to my story….

We had decided to have a bonfire to burn the huge amount of crap we have to burn, not least the smelly damp chicken hay, from the now defuct Chicken Hilton and the old rotted wood from our old roof. But hubby had been at work for half the day and had been busy all week so we decided against it and just had a lovely evening with some friends, drinking lots of wine and eating very hot chilli! (Are we getting old!)

Because Rich had been busy all week and worked yesterday I had promised him a lie in (it is so easy when you live this life to work every day all day and you would still not get everything done!) and a snuggle in bed. What better a thing to do on a cold frosty morning?

Bus Sophie, the Sofa Loaf, (also known as Nitty, Nutty, Nora) the toothless cat that we have adopted since living here, had other ideas and decided to Meowly Meow at the top of her voice as soon as the sun started to rise. So as husband snored (seriously he could sleep through a tornado that man – Oh wait he did!!) I decided to get up, let the mad cat out and make some tea (as I often say we are English after all!)

As is the way life showed me the way and I was greeted by the sun just rising over the horizon and it took my breath away.

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Yes! I was out in my garden again in my pyjamas and dressing gown!

I had to do it, I felt the need to embrace that beauty on that crisp, cold morning. It was stunning and as always made me think that without the cold, and the cat waking me up I would not have seen this.

Everything in life happens for a reason, you just have to look sometimes to find out what it is.

The whole sky was breathtaking with rolling clouds all around us

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So as I was preparing for this blog and downloading my photos, I saw this one and it made me stop in my tracks ……

I thought for a brief moment that I had caught in the clouds a face of a cat, and my heart stopped because I thought it must be Tinky Tiny Tilly, our beautiful little black cat who never came home nine months ago. I ran down the stairs to Rich and showed him and he could not believe it either, until he noticed the orange lines on it and I remembered that I had taken the photo the day before – it is a photo of Sophie in her favourite place – my car!

Perhaps I am the Nitty, Nutty Nora, or perhaps I just wanted to believe!

Have a good week folks, remember enjoy everything life has to offer, you can get comfort from the smallest thing.

Moisy

Change – You’re never the driver..

04 Thursday Oct 2018

Posted by in Change is a coming, The continuing adventure

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Come gather ’round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You’ll be drenched to the bone.
If your time to you
Is worth savin’
Then you better start swimmin’
Or you’ll sink like a stone
For the times they are a-changin’.

Times they are a changing. Bob Dylan

So I said very early on in the year that ‘Times they are a changing’ (to quote Bob Dylan). In fact at the beginning of the year I just found myself playing this song as I wrote at my desk; and change they are in many ways for us, in fact they have in many ways already.

It is fair to say that this adventure has changed so many things for us, but this blog is about all of the things that I didn’t envisage:

Firstly we didn’t envisage getting Harley five years ago, but fate made us change our holiday plans, book a gite with the person who bred him, who in turn contacted us when he needed a new home.

When we moved here with Harley our love affair with Welsh Terriers had begun but didn’t envisage getting ‘The Wiglet’, her other homes failed, or fell through and it was because we were destined to get her.

This in turn led Karen to get Dylan, and write a blog about her antics (Dylan’s Welshie World) which in turn led Karen back to her first love – writing.

As you all know we are changing material things, the gate, the roof, having water. There are other changes in the pipline and they will include, at some point, a new joint blog and again this will change our lives and others. I didn’t envisage any of this when this year started.

Then I think of the sprititual changes that this journey would take us on: That I would read the Tao, then read it to Rich, and Karen, although at times  she does still have  ‘Tao Light Thursday and No Tao Friday’! The belief that we have got from reading that philosophy has changed our lives in the physical world, we stepped off that cliff and believed that the things we needed would come to us and they have. We understand that where there is good there is bad and vica versa but to not focus on the bad – see the good in the simplest things (Autumn and all it’s glory as I write this.) and be greatful for what you have each day because there is no point worrying about what you cannot change, and you may not have another day so just enjoy what you’ve got.

In addition, in fairness, I rarely make hard and fast plans, because I know from all the books I read that the best laid plans will never work out because you are not doing the driving.

When I first moved over here I started to write this blog which in turn led to my writing my book. It  was always my intention to share our experiences with others because people need help when they find themselves where we were once, especially those with a strong persobality like my own, boy it is hard to harness the wild horses in your brain some times!  But over the last month I finished reading Deepak Chopra, ‘The Seven Spiritual laws of Success’ and I took my lead from the end of the book and decided to serialise my book and get it out there. I realsied that, as Deepak Chopra says, I would be doing something that I was put here to do, something that I love (writing) and  in that  I would be helping people at the same time.

I realised that I could not wait forever for the book to be published when there were people out there who needed to read it, because it would help them cope, help them  know that they are not alone, help them know that they can get through it, and help them know that life can get better. So I have started to blog it; and the reaction has been overwhelming. Thank you all.

I know from the reaction in over less than two days that this is likely to change our lives again -not least the reassurance that I have given to my husband because he worries that I will leave him one day. (Yes, even now!) But the difference is that now when I reassure him it works and he is then fine and comforted.

I knew that I was taking a chance, that some would judge, but as I always say my dear late mother was right when she said ‘if they’re judging you they’re leaving some other poor bugger alone!’ I started to write because of my breakdown, I was sick of biting my tongue, I wanted to say what I wanted to say and, as with everything, I know that I have to step of the cliff and take that chance.

What does that have to do with having an adventure in France – everything – I have freedom now. I started to write this blog – which gave me the confidence to write my book, and in turn the confidence to serialise it in another blog; I started to read books that made you think outside of the box, to understand and believe that, much as we think we are, we are not doing the driving where our lives are concerned, and although it took a lot of lessons we are now seeing the benefits of that belief.

I would not have done any of this if we had not moved to France, stepped off the hamster wheel and see where life took us.

Who knows what is coming next – autumn……..

Moisy

If you want to read my other blog then it is called making this better @makingthisbetter.com But be warned, there is a possibility of tears and strong emotion.

Thank again

Moisy

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To always have hope – Feels like home

16 Sunday Sep 2018

Posted by in Change is a coming, My home, Reflections, The continuing adventure, The seasons

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When we moved here, three years ago last month. our pampas grass was small and not growing well.

It was squashed between numerous pine tress that overshadowed it depriving the poor pampas grass of any light; add to that Harley would lay in it as if it was a little nest and it did not stand much chance. Despite this it continued to live, but no grasses would appear in September and stand tall and majestic with their fronds blowing in the wind.

I love pampas grasses. I always wanted it to grow, lived in hope that one day it would have huge grasses, the size of paddles, blowing in the breeze and framing our beautiful view. Well this year we choppped down most of the trees – we had to some were dead, some posed a risk to the electricity cables – and the pampas finally got the light that it needed.

‘It won’t grow’ said Rich when we talked about it one night, ‘Harley still lies in it and squashes it!’

But I held on to hope. I had started to get the vibe that this old French farmhouse, and it’s ghosts of the past two hundred years, had finally accepted ‘Les Anglais’ and realised that we loved the house as much as they had. Being French they knew that, although we had not had much money, we would do our best to look after it; and, suddenly, things started to go our way: The trees were chopped down, the front door was replaced, the gate was replaced, the water connected, we now have French vehicles, our roof will be done before winter. We have the support and help from good friends, some considered as family, and help from those who care, and as the year went on the pampas grass grew and grew.

So here we are now and this is our pampas grass

Things are changing …..

The line it is drawn
The curse it is cast
The slow one now
Will later be fast
As the present now
Will later be past
The order is
Rapidly fadin’.
And the first one now
Will later be last
For the times they are a-changin’

Bob Dylan

Have a good weekend folks never give up, always have hope

Moisy

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Hope and the young

13 Friday Jul 2018

Posted by in Change is a coming, Reflections, The continuing adventure

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And that is what this post is about – the power of hope; and what the young players in the English team brought to so many over the last few weeks.

I am inspired to write about them not because of their feat – and it was in itself a fantastic feat- but the hope that they inspired in so many young people in England who, at this moment in time, feel so disenchanted and disenfranchised.

England is in disarray in a way that it has not been for hundreds of years: A botched referendum, division amongs many, and mainly the older English people, jobs disappearing at a fast rate of knots, the inability to buy their own homes (after all an Englishman’s home is his castle), high levels of debt, zero hour contracts; is it any wonder that our young people fear for their future?

But this year a young England team went to the World cup without much support from at home; after all England have been dismal for over ten years and I think a lot of people thought that would not change. But along came this young team, led by a measured and calm manager; who presented himself of the pitch immaculately irrespective of the heat and never seemed to lose his cool. He led by example. It is shame that others in England cannot do the same and are only out to make a name for themselves, a particular odious buffoon of a politician comes to mind!

This England team, the oldest only being thirty one and the youngest being nineteen, took the lead from their manager, not only did they play well – and the still have a game to play – but they did so with dignity, they did not respond to bad tackles and bad behavior on the pitch, they showed integrity and humility throughout. But, more importantly, they gave the young people in England hope. Big screens started to appear across England in a show of unity for all to support their home team, the young people started to believe that things could change, that they could improve, that England could get better; and that was the most important thing of all from this world cup.

My son messaged me to say he thought that this was a turning point for England, that if this young team could do so well, then things could get better, he had hope. Yes there were the few that behaved badly, terribly at times and it is a shame that some people focused on that negative and seemed to completely lose the positives that this World cup has given Englands young people; or see that; whilst the behaviour was appalling and it should never be condoned, it happens across the world and not just England.

So whilst these young men lost the semi-final I will reiterate that they still have another match to play and should be supported; and the hope that they have given to our young in England should be noted because at the moment I don’t think the older generations are leading by example. I would ask since when did third or even fourth place stop counting?

Keep the faith in all things, not just the football, don’t wait for the next match or tournament, but use the impetus to make improvements, and to always lead by example.

Good luck boys

Moisy

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